Why can't every day be like Christmas...

...sang Elvis Presley.

Well Elvis dear, I'll tell you why. Christmas can be a bit of a challenge.

Unlike many Christmas babies, I lurve Christmas. I really enjoy buying and giving gifts, and am more than partial to receiving them too!

This Christmas, our first in Melbourne, husband and I offered to host dinner for my extended family. Because Christmas is nicely nestled inside summer we had planned a backyard picnic degustation. The prediction of rain, hial, and even snow for Christmas day meant sitting 28 people in our dining room. This first challenge was overcome without too much trouble. My lovely parentals bought us some champers and wine glasses and a quick trip to Ikea on Christmas Eve (when all their Christmas stuff is half price and the place is quiet) saw out house nicely decorated. Trestle tables care of the Stellas and chairs from various sources arrived. So far so good.

The next challenge was a purely personal one. I had put togehter the menu for the night and had given myself the task of doing 'Smashed Chicken'. Sounds friendly enough, but what I had to do was cut off the neck and remove the giblets (mmmm, squishy organs which are still attached...) then cut the chook up the centre, cover it with a tea towel adn smash the crap out of it with a rolling pin. The cutting and pulling off of necks was a less than desirable task, yet somewhow more desirable than scraping out chook organs. I felt vaguely wrong about the smashing part, but also a little bit de-stressed by it. (^_^)

It was a short while after I had prepped the chooks, after having thrown said organs and necks to the dogs, that I noticed my slightly good dog Beans behaivng very strangely. He was very quiet and still (both huge feats for this hyper little foxie) and hiding under a bush. I got a bit worried and asked husband to come and have a loook at him. Husband (thankfully) thought to check the dogs gums as the colour is a great indicator of what's going on. Sure enough his gum were a white-blue colour, meaning he either had internal bleeding or was suffering from shock.

Where does one find a vet on Christmas day when one hasn't even got a vet here yet, let alone know the lay of the land? The Yellow Pages and three phone calls later we were on our way to Bundoora, about 9km down the road, and a $118 consultation fee.

As soon as we got there Beans began to perk up a bit (must be the smell of pigs ears and other dogs) and the vet checked him out. She couldn't find anything wrong with him. I was worried that he had maybe got vitamin A poisoning from chicken livers, however that is appraently a build up thing over time. He had no internal bleeding and nothing caught in his throat, so it was all a bit of a mystery. I got a text from mum saying they'd found a huge vomit in their bedroom so we assumed something he'd eaten hadn't agreed and had somehow put him into shock. We left with some bland food for him to have in 24hrs and instructions to keep an eye on him.

Phew! All good. Home we went.

And we went straight back home to a blackout. Yes, no electricity. We were due to have almost 30 people arrive in the next two hours and we had no power. Thankfully all my cooking was being done in the Weber BBQ. Lucky we'd bought candles at Ikea, or it was going to be a very dark Christmas indeed.

Dad went to go and have a quick snooze and found another massive pile of vomit. I'd have been feeling pretty shit too if I'd thorwn up that much food! Beans had kindly vomitted right next to dad's pillow and over his bedding. Awww, what a nice little grand-dog.

Half an hour later I noticed Beans' face was looking a bit funny. I then realised he had now come out in haves. His whole body was bumpy, his belly spottey and face swollen. Back on the phone to the vets and we were told to come down for some injections.

A measely $18 later Beans had a cortizone and anti-histamine injection.

Back at home the power came on, our alarm went off (as it does every time we have a blackout), Beans made a full recovery, we had three litres of brandy cream (mum trebled the recipe as it didn't sound like enough) and the relatives began arriving.

The rest of the night went quite well, with way too much food (as always, despite mum's worrying), lots of drinking, hilarious KK presents, and a lovely family arguement (which thankfully didn't involve me).

So, Mr Presley, why can't every day be like Christmas? Becasue I would be very poor from vet fees, pulling apart and de-organ-ing my meals, cold and eating spoiled food without electricity, be hand washing dog vomit our of linen and nursing the bruised egos of family members. Also I would be so bursting with food that I probably wouldn't be able to get out of the door.

I did however get some lovely presents so that's OK.

I was only vaguely happy to come back to work today.

Birthday Girl

Here I sit, on my birthday, at home on my lonesome with the prospect of cleaning awaiting me. Hooray. At least I'm not at work!

As one does on such occasions, I am thinking about the last twelve months. It has been a busy one, full of lots of heartache for my family, lots of new adventures for husband and I in Melbourne, and lots of hair colours for me. Here are a words and pics to sum up my year:

Cancer

Farewell Alby

More cancer

Family deaths

Moving interstate (bye bye Mount Ainslie!)

Become Domestic Goddess

Red stripey hair

Successful surgery for dad

New job (thankfully, as am not a very good Domestic Goddess)

More successful surgery for dad

Purple stripey hair

More family deaths

Drinking lots of beer/champers

Visits from family

Visit from Lan

Red stripey hair again (so much bleach!)

Baby Stella

Baby Pilli

Baby Fitzy

1st Wedding Anniversay

Visit to Brisvegas

Sherdie's b'day in Brisvegas

Cousin's wedding

Birthday! Am now in my late mid-twenties. So old! So old! heh heh (^_^)

Sharks, boats, olives and wine

Yesterday I went on a bus trip with work (supposedly a PD day) to Queenscliff, past Geelong.

Our first stop was at the Marine Education Centre, funded by the Department of Primary Industries. They have an awesome building, built to be as environmentally friendly as possible (they have grass and soil on the roof for insulation) right on Swan Bay, one of the worlds first marine sanctuaries/national parks.

In terms of the science that happens there, it was quite exciting, but probably not to read about, so I'll just give the highlight - I got to pat a shark!!! They were only Port Jackson sharkies, so not terribly scary looking, but very solid little animals. I was reminded of a staffy dog (particularly a naught little staffy names Piggie) in that they were all head, mostly muscle and had a tendency to bite when excited.

Following the Marine Ed Centre we went to the Maritime Museum in Queenscliff. A comparison to 'bat shit' in terms of my personal interest level would not be far off, but I'm sure if I liked boats it would have been exciting. I did like the Fresnel lenses from old lighthouses, but that just shows the inner nerd in me. OK, so not so inner, perhaps it just shows off my surface nerd.

Despite having patted a shark earlier in the day, I was still keen to have my fish and chips for lunch at the Queenscliff Esplanade Hotel before jumping on the bus to visit an olive grove.

A very brief stop where we were told how olive oil is made, followed by a quick olive oil and olive tasting and purchasing of olive related products, before being whisked away to wine tasting at Scotchman's Hill winery.

I was not overly impressed by any of the dozen odd wines we tried, but was amused by the spittoon. I didn't purchase any wines as the labels weren't pretty enough.

A nice day all up, although most of the niceness was in the fact that I wasn't at work!

"Is the sun going to explode?"

...a woman asked who called my work yesterday. Thankfully I didn't take her call or else I probably would have been very confused, and possibly stifling laughter.

I took it for granted that people know what the sun looks like when there's lots of bush fires about. This woman genuinely thought the sun was going to explode and felt compelled to ring her local science centre. At least she rang someone to ask and didn't pack herself up into a bomb shelter or something.

Perhaps I've just seen the sky this way more often than Melbournians? In Canberra we regularly had bush fires, some only a few streets away from home. At Potato Point (south coast NSW) it was unusual for there not to be a bush fire at Christmas time.

Even though a black and orange sky isn't new to me, it is still eerie when the whole world has an orange tinge to it. It puts me in mind of the time there was a volcano eruption years ago (in Indonesia maybe?) and the sky was almost red on the horizon because there was so much dust and ash in the air.

You know you're tired when...

...you rub toothpaste into your face instead of moisturiser.

It took me a moment to work out why the moisturiser was so sticky. Oh well, at least I'll be minty fresh all day!

I think I need a holiday.

Oook?

Last Friday a colleague organised for a group of us from work to meet with programs staff at Melbourne Zoo to see the new orang-utan enclosure.

There are two enclosures - one family unit (mum, three year old and a big daddy) and one with two females. The three year old is pictured here on the left, followed by the big male, and then one of the females in the second enclosure. These classy pics were taken using my phone so aren't the best quality!

Apparently no orang-utan enclosure has ever been built that they haven't gotten out from (just because they can, not out of misery). At Melbourne Zoo, so far so good, but it is still early days. The mum has made a few attempts, so changes are still being made to the enclosure to keep it secure as she keeps experimenting.

There is something absolutely amazing about getting up really close to any animal at a zoo, especially one who is staring back and probably finding you just as interesting to look at (actually I felt a little like I was making a social faux pas staring so intently at something so human, but then they were staring back so I figured it was OK).

Most of the orang-utans came up to the glass to stare back at us, especially the big male. He was most interested in the kids looking in, and put his hands up around his face to cut out the glare so that he could see better. He sat and stared for a while, breathing on the glass occasionally and fogging it up, before moving on. I felt like we had been assessed and found no longer interesting. Much to our disappointment as we couldn't get enough of him!

I was put in mind of the Librarian in the Discworld novels and could just imagine this big fella swinging from bookshelves with small cries of 'Ook'.

One of the females was chewing a piece of plastic that she had pinched from somewhere. The keeper was having difficulty convincing her to give it up (too good a toy apparently) and was trying to think of something he could swap her for it. You can see the bit of plastic in her mouth in this pic which she showed off from time to time. You can also see my cute pink phone - hurrah!

Following taking this photo I put my hand up to the glass to say hello. She thought I was trying to pinch the plastic so hit the glass to shoo me away and then ambled off.

There are also some siamangs who share the enclosures. When they were introduced they all got on famously and played lots of games of chasey. Because the siamangs are so much smaller and faster it wasn't really a fair game. I'm told that the big male had sore muscles the next day because he really isn't used to much exercise (I totally feel his pain).

By the end of our trip (we also went to see the elephants, so fabulous!) every single one of us was wishing we worked at the zoo.

Second Dates

Following the success of my first date with Brisvegas, I tentatively stepped out of the hotel to find breakfast with my new found friend. Several chai latte's and several chapters of Agatha Christie later I wandered down Little Stanley St (I think?) and found a day spa, where I booked myself in for a massage later that day.

Husband had finished his morning MC-ing duties at GDAA and we wandered around South Bank. We marvelled at the river. We marvelled at the beautiful weather. We marvelled at the fake beach... WTF? Yes, there is a fake beach, life guard, bikinis and all. We also were witness to an amazing display of hip hop dancing by a group of Islander guys in the Piazza. It was absolutely awesome! There was a huge crowd watching and cheering and sadly it made me feel very uncoordinated and very white.

We took in the atmosphere (well, ate ice cream) and did some window shopping. I toddled off for my massage and emerged bleary eyed and relaxed one hour later. Husband escorted me to lunch (was feeling a little drunk I was so relaxed) where we feasted on beautiful beer battered fish and chips.

A lazy afternoon on the couch reading was followed by me waiting impatiently for Sherdie to finish work so that I could drink the bottle of champers in the mini bar.

The arrival of Sherdie was followed closely by the arrival of Sherdie's lovely Brivegan rellies - bro and fiancee. The champers was consumed efficiently and we headed for dinner at a Mexican restaurant in West End.

Yummy food was consumed, then we hopped on a bus to the Valley (I'm sorry, are we in Clueless now?) where we saw Grand Atlantic and Vascoe Era (sp?) playing at The Zoo (not an actual zoo, but a dark place of beer and music). There was a group of young white boys displaying their terrible dancing skills (especially compared to the guys dancing at the Piazza earlier in the day) - they say white men can't jump, I think it is fair to say white boys can't dance.

Midnight came (as did songs of 'Happy Birthday' for the Sherdmeister) and we toddled out into the night to head towards home. The taxi lines were long so we decided to walk. From Fortitude Valley to South Bank. That turne dout to be a long way. In our hour long walk (slightly longer than I had anticipated) Sherdie gave a running commentary of interesting Brissie landmarks (and some less interesting ones). I can't remember any of the names (except the sky needle) but examples ran something like this:

Sherd: See that park? It's really famous.
Miff: Why?
Sherd: Um, I don't know, but when you say its name people are all like "oh that park! yeah."

So I got to learn a lot about the city, which was nice, but it would have been a lot better if it wasn't early in the morning and I had consumed large portions of beer.

As far as second dates go, Brisvegas managed to show me a fun time, that was also educational (thanks to Sherdie).

Miff in Brisvegas - Girl Meets City

A very dear friend of mine, Sherdie, set me up on a blind date with Brisvegas over the weekend. I was nervous about meeting Brisvegas (was Brisvegas a Brisvegan? What would we eat?) so Sherdie kindly came along as my chaperone.

Thursday night saw us meet Brisvegas in West End, for dinner at an Indian restaurant. THe waiter tried to take our order twice - firstly at the appropriate time (that being when we'd arrived) and secondly after we'd eaten our meals, our plates cleared and our wine almost finished. Despite explaining that we'd already eaten, he kindly brought us fresh plates. Again we explained we'd already eaten and were in fact preparing to leave, and sent him on his confused little way.

So far, the date was going well. Sherdie played her role well, telling me interesting facts about Brisvegas that would interest me and open up opportunities for conversation. I know how badly she wanted us to get along, as she harbours (not very secret) desires for Brisvegas and I to hook up a little more permanently, and for me to make yet another interstate move.

The wine at dinner had relaxed my nerves about this first (and important) meeting with this city so I was happy to kick on at Sherdie's lovely little one-beddy and drink home brew. Brisvegas brought a lovely atmosphere of cool breezes, which was very soothing!

A drunken stumble back to my hotel and the first date came to a successful end.