Fascinator Fever

I'm starting to get a little scared about how serious Melbournians are about Melbourne Cup. Not really that surprising I suppose, after all we do get a public holiday for it (which I have to work on - the joys of operational jobs).

What is really frightening is the amount of hats, feathers and fascinators that are around. For the uninitiated, fascinators (as modeled by the scary mannequin) are those funny little cod piece shaped hats that you stick on your head using a comb. They are usually overwhelmed with feathers and bits of fluff.

I visited the big Spotlight at DFO yesterday* and got really confused and a bit disoriented as the store is exactly like the one in Queanbeyan back at home. There were feathers everywhere. I feel like I'm not really being a good Melbournian if I don't have my own fascinator.

It will be interesting to be here to see just how seriously it is regarded on the day. Should I wear a fascinator to work next Tuesday? Is it a faux pas to wear a fascinator outside of a visit to the races?

I'm not entirely clear as to whether I'm supposed to be more excited by the horses or the dressing up, but I'm trying really hard. I do find horses' penises funny, but I don't think that counts.

I had no idea that horse racing was a six week season of events. I've had it explained to me that first we have football, then we have horse racing, then we have cricket. Just like on channel ten - first we have Big Brother, then we have Australian Idol, then we have some other reality TV show that I'm likely to enjoy watching brainlessly.


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* I know I shouldn't shop at Spotlight as they are bad and evil and used the new IR laws to get rid of penalties for their poor staff, and instead gave them a 2c an hour pay rise.