A Day in the Life

9am(ish) the Domestic Goddess rises. Ahh, bask in her beauty...

See how she is perfect in every way (and if you say otherwise there will be bloody trouble, I can tell you).

She sparkles with the inner glow of knowing she is fabulous.



Now to begin the day properly, with a holy offering of a cup of tea in one of her lovely new heart shaped tea cups.

Be it vanilla, chai, English breakfast, or a refreshing strawberry raspberry cranberry combination (as shown here) tea is the drink of the Domestic Goddess until 12pm (when vanilla vodka becomes appropriate).




Once she has broken her fast, the Domestic Goddess must visit her loyal worshippers at the local antique shops.

Here she blesses her people with wealth in exchange for small and beautiful offerings, such as another new tea cup.






It is then time to be re-energised by the sun, by laying in the yard reading one of the holy scriptures (such as Agatha Christie, Kerry Greenwood, Terry Pratchett).

Here she is guarded by the holy of holy beings - the daughter and son of bitches. They protect her very vocally from passing birds, cats, leaves, clouds and often invisible things.



Because the Domestic Goddess chooses to bless Melbourne as her place of residence, the sun does not last long and she retreats inside to create wearable miracles (knit beanies) for blessed relatives and friends (or unlucky, depending on your point of view).

Miracle creation is often accompanied by Queer Eye at 12pm and Oprah at 1pm.



Eventually she realises she has to wash the bloody dishes.

Then she gets the evening sacrifice prepared early to ensure she maximises her Neighbours and Big Brother viewing. Trashy television is a necessity to keeping the Domestic Goddess stress-free due to the busy, difficult and challenging lifestyle she must succumb herself to.